I've had a tremendous amount of time just to think about things lately. I'm not depressed either, I've been thinking all about my life and how far I have come, and how thankful I am for all of it. While at Busch Gardens earlier this week, since Kim didn't work, I found myself reflecting on all of the good fortunes that have fallen upon me in the past few years, and how earlier in my life I would have never dreamed them possible.
I'm partly referring to the fact that I am valedictorian. I never imagined that my rank would be anywhere near to number one. In fact I remember greatly hoping that I would make top fifteen, and was inwardly scared that I wouldn't. I had always heard about the people who always made straight A's, from Cindy Bush to Heath Harper to Jeannie Menoski. When I found out that I was number three, I flipped. Talk about a feeling of euphoria as well as a major ego boost. I found out that those Honors points really pay off.
My history teacher at Leto, Mr. John Hopkins, who was also the Student Council sponsor once told us a story. He was a very fun teacher who also made us learn alot, and was also very into our social activities and problems. He was one of my favorite teachers. Anyway, the story was about this girl who graduated from Leto many years ago. Everybody knew the person that was going to be valedictorian of that class, and nobody even thought of anybody else taking the honor. Nobody except that girl, she secretly took just enough classes, and made just the right grades, to beat the other person and to shock the school. Even though he told us this a while before we first received ranks, I always remembered it and it was sort of my inspiration to become number one. It made me sit down and think and figure out that with the right classes, I could beat Cindy. Once I knew that it was possible, I was damn determined to do my best to succeed, and I did. I thus have always been thankful to Mr. Hopkins, and have wondered if I would have ever though it possible enough for me to become valedictorian if it weren't for his story.
Speaking of favorite teachers, and great influences, I figure maybe I should write down their names so I will always remember. The first was Mrs. Edwards, my third and fifth grade teacher at Town & Country Elementary. Them there was Mr. Nabors at Potter for sixth grade. I first started doing well in math in his class because he made it fun. He had a contest once with a hard math problem. I won two rolls of pennies, which I still have, for getting the correct answer. He was also an interesting person. He could make beautiful chalk drawings, and carve reindeers from wood. The third was Mrs. Decker, my history teacher at Webb for eighth and ninth grades. She used to chain smoke and we made fun of her. She took us downtown many times on her own time to campaign for the 1988 elections. She was a fun and really nice lady. Stacy and I went and visited her once last year, she remembered me of course, but not Stacy. Then there is Mr. Hopkins.
I also was thinking about how I used to do back in the lower grades. I didn't do that great in many of my classes until they mattered. I went from C's in seventh grade science to straight A's from then on, until the end. It just seems amazing to me that I was under the wrong circumstances for so long and still came out so perfect. Obviously I have a much better self image and much more self confidence than I used to. I remember how I used to have a dreadful fear of talking in front of people, even in the gifted classes with the people I had been with for years. It was pure fear to that point that I once almost acted unrationally just because I had to give a couple of quick health reports for Coach Mueller in Health. Thank God nothing happened. He was a religious nut and tried his hardest to make a difference in the lives of his students, he really cared. I would love to go back and talk with him now, I think he would be very proud of my accomplishments. Anyway, now I am much more open and would never go back to being an introvert. As Jana said, she couldn't get me to talk to her for so long, and when she finally did she couldn't get me to shut up. Of course we used to talk, but it was just this year that it was about personal interesting stuff.
Another thing about my personality is that I always want the best. I would rather wait and not have something for a while, than to get a cheap version of something I want. I sort of used that philosophy in getting my job. Busch Gardens. I was wondering if, back a long time ago when we first had annual passes, if I ever thought that I would someday be working at Busch Gardens. I realize how extremely lucky I am to have gotten such a good job on the Flume ride. There were, so many people that day at the orientation, and only five of us were chosen to work on the Flume. Very few people got ride operations, and even then the only truly fun ones are the three water rides. I was lucky. I remember the day of the interview. I was there with four other people at that time, and none of our quick interviews were that impressive, except that I got to say all of my clubs and activities. Afterwards I lagged behind and told her about me working on valedictorian and so on. I have always wondered if I got a better job because of that, because Brad knew that I was valedictorian before I told anyone there.
They tell us how lucky we are to have gotten jobs there anyway, because there are always tons of people applying to Busch that are turned away. Only about three or four people got hired from Leto of the more than sixty that signed up. I really appreciate my job which is why I work hard to do good, and I seem to be the person that enjoys the job the most. I'm the only one that still has fun talking and waving to the people on a regular basis, especially the girls.
Uncle Jon stopped by today. I received a `graduation card' from him on Wednesday and a check for thirty dollars. The card was a Tampa Tribune order form because he couldn't find anything else. Rick had said earlier that the two of them had one shopping and couldn't find a graduation card anywhere. I thought it was funny and witty. I bought my base tube and it sounds damn good, not too loud, just perfect. I was comparing my car stereo to the one in Jon's van and was making fun of him.
I also received my housing bill today. I got Beaty Towers which is good. I had requested Broward Hall as my first choice because Derek, Minh, Jana, and Cindy did the same. I requested Stacy as a roommate and when he decided not to go, it probably got me bumped to Beaty. Oh well. But Beaty has some definite advantages. It is four roommates in an apartment like living arrangement with four rooms. Two double bedrooms, a KITCHEN with a sink, stove, and refrigerator, and our own bathroom! It is newly carpeted, air conditioned, with basic cable. In Broward, there is no carpet, no regenerator, one kitchen per floor, and one bathroom per thirty people. This could work out nicely as long as it is not run down. I don't think it is because some of the buildings were recently refurbished. I hope. Jon was saying that I will end up going to Florida for the first year, and get so bummed out from all the partying and studying, that I will want to come back to my job at Busch Gardens and go to USF for the last three years.
I don't want to leave Busch now as it is. I want Kim. She works tomorrow and Sunday. While I was at Sand Key on Wednesday and today, I kept thinking about all the things we did and said last Saturday. I was then psychoanalyzing it all. I was thinking along the line that when she said we would have good looking kids together, she has accepted me as a mature human being with whom she would have sex. He He. That sounds nice. Also, when I walked into the back after lunch that day, and saw the pad of paper with all of the doodles and the tiger, I asked who drew the tiger. Bryan said that he did and I told him that it was really good. I realize now that I praised something that Kim had done, in front of Kim, even though I didn't know that she had drawn it. I think she picked up on the fact that I thought something she had done was good, and I wasn't just saying it to be nice to her. She quickly picked up a pen and started working on the tiger after I said that.
When I walked in on Kim's break she seemed in a weird mood. It was like someone had just been talking bad about me to her and she was half upset about it. I wonder what she meant by pulling her fingers through my hair, though. I almost got defensive when she did, and got ready to get up, but I quickly relaxed and remembered (from Nicole) to leave her alone. She was standing, and we were facing each other, and she kept her hand on my hair for a while before she started back. I also like the fact that she trusted me enough to eat ice out of the cup I was holding that she had just seen me drink out of.
I'm thinking that this is all possibly just the way she is with friends, but too much is happening, and we talked far too much about too many personal things for me to believe that.
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