I've had one majorly fucked up weekend and I only wish there was a way to let Shar¡ know how much she's changed me for the better! I actually had to exert an effort today not to have sex with a gorgeous girl because she more than wanted to try...
Anyway, Ed's parents came up to Micanopy last night for a personal camping trip and to drop off the television!!! That was awesome!!! We all stayed home and watched a James Bond movie to celebrate. Afterwards, I pulled out my home video of Shar¡ and popped it in the player. I waited until Jon, Ed, and Roswitha had gone out of the room to start playing it. I didn't want it to look like I wanted to show her off even though I was planning on it. Of course they were all back in the room watching it a couple seconds later on their own doing. It was awesome to see that video again and to hear us talking on our first `official' night. I call it that because it was really the first time that we ever made out for any extended amount of time. Like I said yesterday, it was also the night that Shar¡ passed Kimmeth in my heart although I didn't know that to be the case for a few more days.
After Ed and Roswitha had headed over to her place, I watched the video over an dover again for a while. I then used the bathroom and the phone rang while I was. Jon got up to answer it and I had him tell the person to call back in five. He said he thought it was Shar¡. It turned out to be Laura which was rather interesting. She said that she had a big favor to ask me but I turned the conversation over to a personal nature. One of the first things she said is that she heard I have a girlfriend now. I quickly told her that after I got rejected by her, I had to turn to someone else. I then refreshed her memory that it was the girl at the party and the one I met the day we were supposed to go to Despaparados. She argued that she didn't reject me and we started into a pretty serious talk where she eventually said that she would have gone out with me if I had only asked. I made her realize that I had been being nice for a reason all of those times and it was quite funny.
What I keep asking myself over and over is why the girls always come at once!!! Ed told me that you don't even have to tell a girl, but if she can smell a girlfriend on your skin, then it'll make her want you more. Chris and I have said that it excites some girls and poses a challenge that makes them realize that the competition is there and they'll want you even more. I guess it just has a lot to do with fate. I've had to make a lot of decisions in the past couple of months and every single one of them has been for Shar¡. I'm nit sure what it is about her but it's got me.
Laura wanted to borrow my blender and I said of course. She came up with Ashley, Jessica, and some goofy little guy friend of theirs. I had changed my clothes and looked pretty nice when they came in. Laura asked me to come along but I said that I needed to get some rest because Clint's ex-girlfriend was coming up today. We kind of had a little talk about that, too. I greeted Ashley very nicely because I was really glad to see her. They all came in and checked out our new bar and to talk for a few minutes. Laura and I still tell each other that we love each other and were standing there with an arm wrapped around each other. It was kind of funny in front of Ashley. I asked Ashley if she had gotten her letter from Daniel which was kind of mean. She frowned and then pushed her way past Laura and we hugged and she put her head on my shoulder. We said that we'd be there for each other and I told her that we can even hold hands! That was pretty funny in front of Laura.
Laura ended up back under my arm and before they left Ashley stuck her hand out at me and told me that she wanted me to hold it!!! That was pretty awesome! I'll tell her next time that I feel guilty about having unprotected sex with her and we'll laugh about that. I had never been happier to have stayed home on a Friday night after that little interlude, though.
Well, Sarah called this morning at eleven. I had cleaned up the rooms and made the place look really nice. They ended up making it over by noon and I went downstairs to let them in. When I saw Sarah I was amazed because she looked taller and much prettier than I had remembered. Amanda was there with her boyfriend, this big country fraternity guy with a scruff beard. He ended up being really cool, though. We all went upstairs and thankfully there were no roommates at the time. We talked for a few minutes while I finished getting ready and then we decided to go out for a little while. the guy wanted to go look at motorcycles so we obliged. Sarah has a four door teal Saturn which I love. When we got to the place we looked at tall the awesome recreational stuff like the jet skis and so forth. I was joking around with the girls a lot just like the last time at Busch Gardens. Actually this was only the second time I've ever seen them. Sarah and I had kind of grabbed each other's hand by the time we left the store.
We then were debating between going tubing on the river, going to these springs, or just going to see a movie. After quite a while of just driving around, we finally decided to see about a movie. We stopped at a McDonalds for a few minutes and Sarah and I went in for her to change. We ended up each getting a big shake and some fries and we argued forever but she ended up treating. We then sat and talked for a long time and really pissed the other two off out in the hot car. Sarah has the most beautiful tanned freckled breasts and a very attractive body. It has always been a fantasy of mine lately before Shar¡ to do a younger girl for the experience of what I missed in high school. Just to get one while they're still somewhat fresh seemed exciting and shoved itself right in my face today.
We decided to head over to the mall to see a movie or just to walk around. Sarah was starting to get really tired because she had been awake so much over the weekend. When we got there most of the movies had started and we eventually decided to look around in some of the stores. Sarah grabbed me by the hand and we went into a record store. Amanda soon ran up with the idea that we go rent a movie and go back to my place. On the walk out the girls paired off up in front of us and stated talking while we did the same. He had said earlier that all Sarah was talking about on the trip is that she hasn't been fucked in along time and was really looking forward to seeing me! He and I had also joked around making sexual references and he said that he really likes `this guy.' That was pretty cool. Anyway we were talking about sex and he said that he hasn't gotten any in quite a while and I laughed and said that my last was Monday morning!!! He called me a lucky bastard because he knew what was up with Sarah as well. I later mentioned to him that this other girl is my girlfriend which really surprised him.
What really surprised me is how much I've changed since meeting Shar¡ for the better. It used to be that I would have eagerly had sex with two different girls in the same week but Shar¡ means so much to me now that didn't even want to do more than casually touch this girl of my `fantasies!' I really wish there is a way that I could tell Shar¡ what happened so that she could appreciate how I truly feel for her. It ended up that we couldn't rent any videos because we didn't have a major credit card so we went back to my place to see what I have. I bought a box of Vivarin so that Sarah could take a few on her way home so at least they'd live on the drive home at four. We decided it was best if Sarah lay down and I gave her my bed. I ended up going in and talking to her by leaning up on the bed like I did with Shar¡.
I tried to leave a couple of times so she could rest but she kept yelling at me to come back. She really wanted me to kiss her because I would move my face towards hers every once in a while and she would answer back with the same movement. At almost any point all day I could have kissed her and ended up having sex with her. It was entirely my decision because she had yes written all over her face. Amanda and her boyfriend took my main entrance key and kept going downstairs to smoke every once in a while during their Basic Instinct movie. I was alone talking to Sarah and we had been lucky so far that none of my roommates had shown up. Ed walked in and I introduced them. It was pretty funny because we were both in my room and she was already in my bed. I let his imagination wander as he left on his bike ride.
She eventually sat up and I put my arms around her legs and we were holding onto each other and touching a lot. The great impulse to kiss her if even only to make her happy kept rushing through my mind only to be violently stopped by Shar¡. I kept thinking about what my conscience would do to me if I did sleep with Sarah. I probably wouldn't be able to talk to Shar¡ straight and she might figure that something's up. I finally said fuck it in my mind and decided that if she wanted to kiss me, she could do it, but I wasn't going to start anything. I eventually ended up escorting them down. Sarah kept telling m,e throughout the day that she wants to come up pretty soon by herself to stay with me for a weekend. She didn't know where she'd stay until I told her that you can have members of the opposite sex stay in your rooms. That surprised her but she really liked the idea and she said that she'll even cook for me when she comes up. We hugged long and hard before they drove off.
I then went and bragged my ass off to Jon because I was so damn proud of what I didn't do. We had a talk about it for a little while. I then went next door and hung out with the neighbors for a little while. I had already changed back into my dorm clothes. We were joking about sex and I was talking to Leigh Anne about my two girlfriends. I told her that I stayed loyal. She was asking me about Cord and if he is really Shar¡'s baby. I was standing there with them at the kitchen table only to see Sarah and the others walk by to my room! This was more than an hour after they left!!! They saw me in the other room but weren't sure if it was me or not. they wanted to call their moms back in Tampa and try to tell their moms that they would be home even later than they had planned. The hardest part was the fact that neither of them were supposed to be in Gainesville at all. Sarah is really good at home and both of the girls' moms love her a lot and it really made her nervous that Amanda was doing this. Anyway it got done and we all decided to go out. They needed to get ready and I wanted to take a shower so I sent them back to the guy's room for a while. Sarah and I held hands the entire way down and just before she got in the car, we kissed on the lips...
I knew that Shar¡ was probably still at Christine's for the weekend but I tried calling her anyway. Buffy answered and said that they got my new letter but Shar¡ hasn't seen it yet. I then called Christine's house and asked for Shar¡. I then talked to Christine for a few minutes and she was all excited to hear from me. I apologized for being mean to her that night and she really didn't seem to care anymore. It turns out that her party was tonight!!! instead of Friday night. I knew that but just wasn't thinking. I told Shar¡ that I would have come in a second if I would have known and Shar¡ said that she really wishes I had. We talked for a little while and had a really good conversation. I told her that my new letter is waiting for her and it's kind of a different one. She said our little, `Uh oh!' that we make now when we think something bad is going to come out of the other's mouth. I told her just to wait and see. She was telling me first how she really did write me six pages worth in the new one. I told her about how I was getting ready to go out and all. She ended by telling me to be careful and some other stuff and I essentially only told her to be good.
They came back later and the guy still hadn't gotten in touch with his friend about the party yet. The Florida versus Kentucky game came on TV which is really cool because it is pay per view and the student government bought the broadcast for the entire campus! That was great so he and I started watching the game while the girls went out and bought food for us. Sarah kept saying that she really needed to talk to Amanda before they left and they didn't come back for an hour. I called Laura while they were gone and talked to her for a while. We started talking again about how we should have gone out and I was convincing her that I did really want to back at Busch Gardens. I told her how I always told Ronnie to back off and how Mark and I used to talk about us a lot. It was funny and we talked until the girls came back. She accused me of ditching her again but we laughed it off as we said goodbye.
Sarah had taken two Vivarin earlier and was nervous in the first place about her mom so we put her in bed when they got back. Amanda tried calling their moms again because they hadn't been home earlier. Amanda majorly fucked up and ended up hanging up on Sarah's mom!!! Sarah freaked out and started crying because she knew that her mom would end up taking her license away again after all of this was over. I went in the room and held her and she said that Amanda is always getting her in trouble for as long as they've known each other and how she can't wait to come up to Gainesville to get the freedom that living alone gets you. She kept saying all day that she wanted to run away.
I just kept thinking to myself how glad I was that their night was falling apart so I wouldn't get any more chances to be unfaithful. I eventually calmed her down and we were sitting on the stools in the living room alone again. I had both of her hands and she kept asking how I put up with her and that I must hate her for ruining my day. I kept reassuring her that she hadn't in any way. We started looking at each other starry eyed and came very close to kissing a couple of times. I did have my hands all over her but I did keep it respectable. She started getting really nervous again and said that she really just wanted to go to that party for a little while and then they could just go home. Amanda was being a completely stupid bitch to Sarah about the whole thing because she didn't have anything to lose out of the whole ordeal. After both the guy and I said that we can't go to the party because he hasn't even talked to him yet and by that time they'll only have about fifteen minutes before they have to go home.
Sarah then said that she just needed to drive and none of us wanted to give her the keys. The other two walked out right before her and I still didn't think she should be driving right then. I essentially told her that if she left, I wouldn't be going with her and asked her if she's still going to write. She said what? and then asked if I was being serious. I think I said that it was nice knowing her and she got pissed and slammed out. I knew she expected me to follow her and I then heard Amanda ask her what I had said to her. There was no way in hell I was leaving my room right then for something so stupid and dangerous. I was kind of glad that they were gone, too. I figure I'll give her a call sometime this week just to `make up.'
I then started watching the game with Jon and Leigh Anne who came over to talk to me. We were talking about sex and I said that I am depressed. She said that I have no reason to be depressed because I have sex flying at me from all directions, but she's the one who can't get any. I told her that my second girlfriend and I got in a fight and then told her what was said. She said that I am cold, but oh well. She was hungry and was rooting through our refrigerator. I offered to make her a plate of French fries and later said that they brought back memories because Shar¡ and I usually had a plate of them before having sex last weekend. That was funny. We were really pissed that the year was over already as the Gators were losing to the Kentucky Wildcats in the final seconds of the game. The Gator's had rallied and completed a two point conversion to tie the game but Kentucky answered with a field goal. We had essentially lost all hope and had turned our attention away from the game when (I have chill bumps right now just thinking about it!) we looked up to hear screaming and every Gator on TV holding up their arms!!! Our replacement red shirt freshman quarterback had completed an awesome pass to a walk on receiver for a touchdown with only three seconds remaining!!!!! We freaked and I knew that both the year and this week will be awesome...
It was a very screwy weekend.
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