Our horrible grueling mind-wrenching prison-vacation is finally over!!! Actually it was a pretty normal vacation, but longing to be back here with Shar¡ made it seem to drag on forever. I have never wanted to be in Tampa so much ever before. I have to make sure that I don't say the wrong things and cause her to feel bad about ruining my vacation! Now that we're back, I can't wait to finally get to call her tomorrow at a decent hour. Hopefully she'll be surprised because she thought my vacation lasted until Monday. Hopefully she's been waiting for me as much as I've been waiting for her.
I only drove two and a half hours on the way home compared to five and a half on the way up. We made it in a record eight hours on both trips! That shaved two hours off of every trip we had ever made before. It had a lot to do with the fact that I don't stop every few minutes to pee when I'm driving like father use to. In fact, I didn't pee once on the entire trip back!
I wrote a journal entry and some notes `a la paper' while up in Blue Ridge so I'll include them word for word now:
8/1/93
Shar¡ did a damn good job of making me feel great about our relationship as we parted. I'm ready to go back right now to be with her and it's only our first day up here. From my point of view, we both said all of the right things to each other. When she called at 10:30, I told her that I was about ready to call her. She asked why, if I was worried because she hadn't called back in a while. I agreed and joked that she hadn't called every fifteen minutes like it seemed she was doing earlier! I then told her that we were getting ready to leave and I wanted one last chance to talk to her. She told me that she really didn't want me to leave. I told her that I know, but this will be the only vacation of the year that I'll spend with my family. She understands but still doesn't like the idea of me leaving right now.
I told her again about having the cabin in the mountains and was telling her about being able to hike in the woods and raft in the river. She joked, asking me not to tell her all of that because she'll be on the first plane up! I knew she really likes that stuff which is why I was emphasizing them. I told her that I'd write to her, if only I knew her address, which she quickly gave me to her father's house. She told me that she'll really like it if I send her a postcard, and I agreed to possibly a letter as well. We knew that we didn't have that much time left so she started wishing me well. She told me to be safe, have fun, and that she'll miss me. She told me again that she wishes that I wasn't leaving. Then came the line that I loved! She accused me of causing her to become attached to me, and then getting up and going away on her!!! So she's attached now, huh!?! I came back promising to make it up to her by staying home with her the last week when I should have been going to Gainesville. She accepted that and we soon said goodbye as the time came for them to be escorted to their cafeteria for their evening snack.
Attached!!!...
We had been talking earlier on Saturday when I visited her about her hair again. She told me that she might have a perm and look totally different when I come back. I didn't know how serious she was being until she told me that her stepmom's friend is a hairstylist and will do it for free. Since she'll be moving in with her dad now, I'm sure they've already talked about her having something done. I told her again how much I really like her hair straight, and that I don't want her to change it. She said that hopefully it'll look good either way and I retorted with the fact hat it'll always look better straight, so why change? She finally got it through her pretty head that I was being very serious. I even promised to quit nagging her about her smoking if only she'll leave her hair beautiful. She agreed not to change it and was talking later letting it grow and grow way down her back. We'll see...
Attached!!!!!! I can't wait to see her again!!!
8/2/93
Shar¡ doesn't believe in abortion. She told me that she would have any baby.
I personally found it funny when the nurse at UCH asked Shar¡ if she is on the pill in front of me!
I still can't get over the word attatched!!!
I wonder if I should give her my ring, even if only for a while. She finds it to be an ultimate form of trust because she thought about it and realized that `Christina would shit!' when she saw her wearing my ring. I think I will, at least until Gainesville to `attach' her even more!
Damn I can't wait to see her! I think I'm worried about her and other guys as much as she is of me and other girls. She voiced her opinion, though, and I kept my mouth shut. I hope that my promises to stay `faithful' will cause her to do the same.
8/4/93
I've been thinking about how Shar¡ and I met. there were a lot of lucky chances and it seems amazing that our relationship fell into place as easily as it did. I have never been as aggressive with anyone before as I was with her. I had my arms around her only hours after first meeting her! I remember thinking at the time when I was first meeting her that the chances of us actually going out were one in a million, so what the hell!!! What awesome luck that things worked out so beautifully!
Longing to be with Shar¡ has made this vacation a prison. I'm extremely bored, homesick, and have little patience wants me to do work on this so called vacation.
I'm ready to promise Shar¡ that if we're still together next summer, that I will not go away like this again because I no longer have any desire to come back up here.
I just can't wait to talk to and see that girl again!!!
The psycho in Silence of the Lambs is a genius! I'd love to use some of his tactics on Shar¡ to find out why she tried to kill herself. Something sparked what she did. Find out what it was!!!
My parents (Father) keeps telling me that Shar¡ is already dating somebody else. I'd like to think that she is more worried about me dating someone else than I am of her.
8/6/93
I'm waiting now in semi-nervous-excited anticipation over Shar¡ and our reactions to each other when we first talk to and see each other again. I can only hope for the best.
I sent Shar¡ a postcard towards the beginning of the week just so she'll have something physical to remind her of me. I bought a postcard that has a really pretty picture of a waterfall in the woods. I wrote:
Shar¡, Hello dearest, what's up!?! It's day two of my little vacation and it seemed like a good time to write you. I drove about six of the eight hours it took to get up here and was pretty tired the first day. Today we drove around the corner to the Taccoa River ad I went tubing through these really cool rapids a couple of times. We took some pictures and I'll show you when I get back. Well, I'm having some fun, but it's pretty boring so far. I miss you a lot!
Love, Dan!!!
I felt that was pretty much to the point, and was also all I could fit on the tiny postcard. I really hope she got it already. Concerning girls, the week was a total flop. I flirted for a second with two girls at the grocery store yesterday for about fifteen seconds. there was a gorgeous blonde at the check outs in Roses on one of the first days we went. She called us over and I told mother to go to the cute blonde's row kind of loudly. I think this other cute cashier heard me. This girl was gorgeous and father knew that I was looking. I twisted my ring motioning for him to see if she's married but it was hard to tell. She had a bunch of stupid little rings all over her fingers. We looked at each other on the way out, and she turned completely around and we started at each other through the glass as I held the door open for Family. that was the only good experience the entire week.
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