June 28, 1995 - Wednesday - A beautiful beast

     There's actually a girl here at Vista Way that I am completely entranced by. She picks up where my fascination for Lara left off. I dare say I would marry this girl right now without knowing anything further than I already do about her personality and lifestyle. Of course I speak of Kristen's roommate, Jennifer Merritt.

     Jen comes from Pennsylvania but goes to school with Wil at Bowling Green in Ohio. She has admitted to being a spoiled brat, the daughter of very prominent parents. Jen is Presbyterian, but says
that her virginity has nothing to do whatsoever with her religion. She is waiting only for the right guy to come along. This may very well be the second time Kristen has ruined an opportunity for me to
be a gorgeous virgin's "right guy". The first was Erin Wilcox. Jennifer claims to be anything but innocent but won't explain why, no matter how much I coax and prod. She also says she is really mean and sarcastic (so am I!!!) to those around her. She has agreed to "leave me a letter on my pillow" at the end of the semester explaining the evil within her, and Kristen seems to think it means that Jen has done everything but have sex.

     This girl is just so fucking beautiful. She is a very big girl who is in no way overweight. She's just HUGE! which givers her the ability to carry herself with all sorts of apparent dignity. Despite
her beautiful appearance, he claims to have extremely low self esteem and we had along talk at lunch yesterday where I tried to relate to her about that as much as possible. Unfortunately she is under the
belief that Kristen and I are (or at least should be) dating and I think that truly affects her opinion towards me. I was hoping to fight the odds and see if I could milk this inner bad girl to see if
she be willing to consummate.

     Or perhaps I could look a little bit closer to home and fight for a bit of recognition from Alli Gill. She is the Zeta from UF which is in my seminar. She is very beautiful and we can actually talk and joke around with each other without much difficulty. I actually find myself looking at her with what I call "smiling eyes". Like a gentle and tender but very happy glisten that I also see as she returns my gaze...

     Well, I'm lying here staring at my giant confederate flag on the wall, and listening to one of my two new Disney Classic CD's that each have twenty-five songs each from all of the Disney animated
films prior to Pocahontas.

May 17, 1995 - Wednesday - Vista Way

     I've finally made it to Disney World against all of my
pessimistic expectations. CJ returned my call the very next day last
Thursday telling me she had found my paperwork. I thanked her
profusely but still had a bit of fear that someone had screwed up and
signed me up for the fall. I decided to just wait things out and hold
my breath until I got up here to see whether or not everything would
work out.

     Meanwhile I kept insisting to Kristen that I was so pissed at
Disney altogether for not taking an interest in my problem that I was
ready not to even bother showing up at all. In part this was true,
just in case, but I didn't bother to ever tell her that they called
me back. I was very prepared to get a job at Kmart or Walmart, or
maybe even both, and just bike over there all of the time. I figured
I could make and save up some pretty impressive bucks by doing so,
and meet some local girls to mess around with. Kristen was pretty
freaked out by the whole facade until finally I gave in and told her
at about midnight just before I'd be leaving in the morning for
Orlando. She was mad at me while at the same time glad I was going
which made it fun to hear her try to spit out what she felt.

     I had been asking her how she feels about me over the last few
days before we came up here. I wanted to know exactly where she
stands so I could understand and treat her better instead of so
sarcastically. I also wanted to know what it was like for her to be
around me the entire time after breaking up, unlike Shar¡ and I which
apparently was much harder being apart. She ended up breaking down
and telling me that she definitely still loves me, something which I
knew already. I actually told her that I love her, too, but in the
sense that I care about her very strongly as a best friend and
someone to talk with regardless of who is having problems.

     I headed out of Tampa with Father just after dropping Chrissy
off at the bus stop in the morning. It only took us about an hour and
a half which left us a little while to explore Lake Buena Vista
before we were allowed to check in to the apartments. I soon found
myself in a very nice clubhouse praying as a woman searched through a
file for my name, AND SHE FOUND IT!!! One woman actually said she
knew my name already because she had received two papers on me! That
means they DID get them both and someone was really screwing up on
me. I signed my paperwork and then headed into another room to get my
room information. This country boy ahead of me asked me when my
seminars were and I immediately thought that he was a pretty nice
guy. When I received my room agreement I notice that the guy was in
my room so I walked up to him and said, "Hello roommate!" and we
introduced ourselves.

     The guy, Matt, is from North Carolina, home of the Tar Heels,
and comes from a town of thirty-five thousand called Morganton near
Ashville. I ended up beating him to the room where I met Heath
Mitchell from the Texas flatlands. Heath goes to Texas Tech and is a
lifeguard as is his roommate, another Matt. I thought that was pretty
cool figuring they'd be be bringing over quite a few girls, and when
they turned out to be jerks, Attentive Dan would be the want they
want. Clint, from Ball State in Ohio, picked up on the fact last
night after seeing me at work. He asked me if I'm the silent yet
deadly type and I strongly agreed that I am. Clint vows to have me
changed by the end of the summer so that the girls will be coming to
me rather than me going after them. We'll see.

     I picked a bedroom and as soon as Matt showed up I had him room
with me. I figured it would be easy to get along with a fellow hick
especially when it comes to country music. He also offered to sleep
out on the couch any time I wanted to bring a girl over for which I
was very grateful and will also respect towards him. The last
roommate's name is Keven and he turns out to go to the University of
Florida with me. That was weird because Rick promised not to do that
but oh well. He's the biggest nerd of the bunch but he's still pretty
cool. Everybody here is.

     Kristen and I planned to meet up at four just before our meeting
but I went to an early one and thus was free for the rest of the day.
The second one was at five but I decided to check and see if she'd be
there anyway. If not I was going to be pretty pissed and not worry
about her until she found me. I checked both meeting places and just
as I did, her mom's car drove by and they noticed me. They made me
get in the car and took me back to Kristen's apartment. They had just
gone to the grocery store and had taken Jen, Kristen's roommate from
Bowling Green, Ohio. Jen is perhaps the most gorgeous girl I have met
so far and I have already let Kristen know it She's been a little
lacking on the personality side but claims that's just because she's
been really tired after the plane trip and all.

     Kristen's physical roommate is Sally from Alabama who is in
Delta Zeta which I have already dubbed "DiZzy" or maybe even "DitZy".
She has an awesome southern accent but seemed like a total bitch. I
ended up meeting all of the other roommates and then we all decided
to go out to some bars to hang out. There were free drinks for ladies
at the Baja at Crossroads so everyone over twenty-one wanted to go
there while we all went to Johnny's. Kristen, Jen and I decided to
head back to the apartment early because Kristen hadn't eaten yet and
there was nothing really for us to do, especially with Kristen
around. On the way back some girls at a party on the third floor were
yelling hello out the window. Some guys behind us yelled back but the
girls said they weren't talking to them and then pointed at me! I
felt special, for a second.

     The others stepped back by the room and Sally stopped at he
counter and stared at Kristen for a second and I told Kristen how sad
Sally looks now that we left her as the only person under twenty-one!
When Kristen realized that we did leave her she freaked out and
became very apologetic. I knew that wasn't really on Sally's mind but
it did cause her to suddenly open up with us and we had an awesome
time talking and hanging out for the next couple of hours. She's a TV
freak and knows all kinds of trivia. She also practically has every
episode of Beavis and Butthead memorized which I have never seen a
girl do before. I guess her sorority doesn't quite take up all of her
time. She's also strongly for the death penalty and we agreed
perfectly on a lot of other extremist ideas. Kristen was shocked that
our personalities matched so exactly and of course I loved it. After
Sally went to bed, Kristen and I actually messed around for a little
while in front of an open window, and then I had Kristen shave my
neck in the bathroom.

     I headed home after that hoping the guys would have girls over
and I wasn't disappointed. They were all sitting around the table
playing drinking games when I walked in, except for Keven who was
watching. I sat down for a few minutes and this one girl kept talking
top me trying to find out what I had done and was asking if it would
have been more fun if she was there. I thought she, another Jennifer,
was pretty good looking and so was her friend, Lara (Clara without
the C, as she apparently introduced herself earlier). I soon found
myself sitting on the countertop overlooking there game and chugged a
Michelob Light before joining in. I placed myself very stealthily
right in between Lara and Jennifer as we started playing a variety of
card games headed by Clint.

     Fortunately the two buzzing girls at my side didn't know how to
play poker so I got to "teach" them. There was a third girl there
named Kendra from New Mexico whom the guys like but I think is
disgusting. The opinions of Lara are completely reversed because I
love her and they all think she's a fucking bitch. I helped Jennifer
win a hand of poker just before getting twenty-one in a game of the
same name myself.

     Jennifer had been talking about this racist joke her dad had
told her when she told him she had two black roommates but didn't
want to tell it because she didn't know anyone that well yet, etc.
Clint was constantly begging her to tell it and then I tried. Two
minutes later she agreed but said we'd have to go outside and we did.
Lara came too because she was mad that Jennifer wouldn't even tell
her, her own roommate. I looked back at the desperate bunch of guys
and apologized for stealing their women so quickly, for Kendra had
already gone home. Jennifer told us the classic bowling balls as
n..... eggs joke. She then kept asking if I'd think badly of her now
and I said definitely not, and that I respect her more for being
truthful now rather than later.

     After we had headed back in, Clint was asking us how long we
have known each other and I put my arm around her and said for years
and she smiled and agreed. I later admitted that I'd only known her
for ten minutes and he (they) were upset that she told me and none of
them. Tough break guys. We then played a betting game and needed some
coins. Everyone was scrounging for pennies and I just happen to have
a baggie full from when I was cleaning up at home so I got a big
cheer from everyone when I dumped them on the table.

     As the beer ran out, the guys started getting hungry and were
making some nasty shit. I asked the girls if they wanted some ice
cream and they didn't know how that would be after so much alcohol. I
said that was Ok and I would just wait and they both yelled that I
didn't need to. Jennifer offered to help me eat some and Lara offered
to fix it for me! I guess that's partially why I don't see her as big
a bitch as the others. I heard she had offered Heath the front seat
earlier since he was so tall but the reneged saying that she was a
girl and was in a skirt so she got the front. He hated that a lot and
I think he's holding a little bit of a grudge.

     We were talking about middle names at one point and Jennifer
said to guess hers and I said Ann, and I was right! Yet another
brownie point. We then started making designs with the pennies as we
talked with each other about ourselves. By this time I was alone with
the girls at the table and thought to myself that only I can come in,
steal all of the girls, and turn it into a sensuous (even nerdy)
intellectual talk. I soon really started falling in love as Jennifer
told me that she is studying biomedical technology at Texas A&M with
the intentions of becoming a dentist. She has to take the DAT soon
and has even suggested that I could maybe help her after telling her
my experiences with Kostas. Lara is from Wellington, North Carolina
and goes to the same school as Matt does. She wants to be a doctor
specializing in premature infants!!! I was surrounded by prosperous
people and thus had to brag about my own interest in joining the
medical field.

     After finishing up the ice cream we all took pictures together
and I made sure I was as close as possible to Jennifer as often as I
could be. They then headed home at about three and we all crashed for
a good long time. I was quite proud of my first day's accomplishments
and knew that this is going to be a fucking wild summer!

May 23, 1994 - Monday - Kristen's basketball sex

Shari seems to be gone for good this time. I called her up
tonight after getting the answering machine at Ashley's and I left my
name with the guy who answered. It was her brother Chad and he asked if she has called me lately because no one has heard from her for a
week and a half. I was stunned for a few seconds after I hung up and
I could feel my heart pounding in disbelief. I laughed to myself
about how my mother has been telling me to take Shari to small claims court to get my ring back.

I then gave Sarah a call. She got off the other line and started
telling me what has been going on. She just got dumped by this guy
for his real girlfriend whom he had said he was going to dump. They
were then all at Despaparados and she was there and he wouldn't have
anything to do with Sarah. She was about ready to cry and was really
confused about the whole thing. I then told her the story about Shari
and how I felt all along and she was amazed at how similar my
situation was and how I have experienced exactly what she is going
through. She kept saying that over and over while I was telling my
story and was saying that it all seems the same. I told her that guys
can go through that kind of stuff, too, but women don't think we do
and she disagreed that she knows better.

She was asking me how long it took me to get over Shari and I
picked out feelings that were similar to the ones I knew she was
having right then and told her about those. She agreed with a lot of
them. She wa telling me that she needs to find somebody new real
quick and wants it to be someone she can actually talk to and all
that. I wondered to myself if she considers what we're doing
"talking" because most guys aren't nearly as sympathetic as me. I
started telling her things like, if you get desperate enough, make
sure you always remember me! I was also plugging college guys for
being more mature and all that and she agreed that she wants to get
back into that.

I have a way of dragging things out of her that she normally
wouldn't tell a guy. She laughed once and I finally got the story
out. She told me that she will really miss the sex and then she
laughed really hard and wondered why she was telling me this. I just
told her she'll have to find somebody better (me!). She was saying
that she'll miss that part of him a lot. She kept wanting to call him
really bad and then I explained to her why she shouldn't so he won't
get annoyed with her since he obviously wants the other girl. She is
a virgin and has started birth control so I used my magic and without
cutting down the other guy, I explained the facts of life. She kept
saying that she wondered if he was just using her for sex and I told
her that he was probably because this girl wouldn't have sex with him
and now that she will he'll probably stay with her for good. She's
smart and agreed partially with the logic.

She was also saying that it's been a week and a half since she's
had sex and she's used to it weekly so she's going nuts. I told her
how long my hiatus has been, and then said I'll have to start going
over there after work if she needs me. It was funny. I then joked
that she'll have to resort to good old fashioned fingers and she
laughed really hard and said that she's resorted to her fingers on
various occasions but it's just not as good! She then said, at least
she's being honest and we both remarked on how good a trait that is.
I then said that I am picturing her in what she was wearing in
Gainesville using her fingers and she started yelling at me to stop
thinking about her doing that while laughing all the time. It was
great.

We then stated talking about Gainesville and I was telling her
all about how our new dorms will be and she really seemed to like
that and said tat she really wants to go back up there. We were also
reminiscing about her trip up there and she said it was horrible but
I said it was cool because she bought me lunch and we started
laughing about all that. She also said something about olive green
paint and I wondered what the hell she was talking about. I then
realized that she actually remembered how we had been picking through
the paint on the wall and found green and then complimented her on
her good memory. I also told her how I saw Amanda a few weeks ago and
she said that she knows which means they've been talking. I mentioned
Amanda's boyfriend who looks like a little boy and she laughed hard
and agreed perfectly!

I was also telling her about Georgia and the vacation we are
supposed to take up there pretty soon. She pretty much knows about
the area and would love to come along. We were talking about our
schooling as well and I was telling her how there is a doctor in Blue
Ridge who might be looking for a young assistant to take under his
wing. She is starting to be pessimistic about being a dentist and I
told her she can come be a nurse for me and she laughed. I then
changed it to she can be a partner and she liked that.

She had cheered up dramatically and she had said that I make her
laugh which is really good. She had said that she'll probably cry
about it when she goes to bed and has dead time just to think about
it. She then said that she doesn't like to cry in an extremely cute
little voice and I laughed and she said it a few more times. I
started laughing and told her that she could be in a no-tears shampoo
commercial and that was really funny. I ended our call although she
wanted to talk to me some more just because she has a habit of
sometimes cutting off our calls in midstream because of another call
and I didn't want to push my luck.

I did tell her if she needs to talk anymore to feel free to call
and she almost seemed surprised that I said that. She asked if I
meant it and then reminded me that I have volunteered if she does
start crying to me. It was cute. I told her I always play the
psychiatrist and then said it always good to take advantage of a girl
just after a break up and then we both laughed as I said I am just
being honest. That was a really cool talk.

I then tried calling Ashley again and she was home. She laughed
that she was thinking about me today and wondered if the bozo would
call or not and that she was going to wait for me to since my mom
says she calls too much! We laughed. She then told me what had
happened over the weekend. There is this big field out in Brandon
where all of the kids hang out on the weekends and on Friday night a
guy there pulled a gun and shot and killed one guy and injured two
others. The past was of the Martinez family who are extremely close
to Daniel Vargas' family so she was with them all weekend. Daniel is
on his way home as we spoke to attend the wake and the funeral with
her.

She then said that she has to do all of this and then go to
Jana's wedding this weekend. I told her to say hello to Laura for me
and to give my best to Jana and Jamey. She then told me that he mom
and Grandma are on a two week vacation to Hawaii and then her mom and
dad are going to play golf at Saddlebrook when she gets back. Must be
nice. She also told me that it was Daniel's little sister's
eighteenth birthday on Saturday as well which was basically ruined.
She also told me that she has heard of Erin Wilcox, but doesn't know
why, perhaps she also went to her church nativity. We talked a little
while longer before getting off the phone because I was getting tired
and have to go to work in the morning.

I've started having a wild time with Kristen. It started on
Saturday night at Chris' party which wasn't that great. I arrived
before he even did and the thing didn't start until an hour later
than it was supposed to. I helped them set up and met his two
Jamaican roommates, Francis and Ed. Some cool people started showing
up and I actually held a conversation with Debbie from Congo Rides.
I've known her since I worked at Flume and pooled at the bumper cars
once. That was cool. They finally brought a keg of Ice Draft and I
downed four small glasses pretty quickly. Kerri was there in a cool
black lace top and I talked to her for a few minutes. She brought her
sister and I asked for a show of animals which I got. It was quite
amusing. She has a dorky little boyfriend and I was extremely
unimpressed.

I had these two girls that were really cute try to get me to
join in and dance with them but I really wasn't in the mood. I also
kept talking to Karen all night which was cool. I also ran into her
on lunch in the breakroom and she talked to me about her and Ryan's
problems like I was her best friend or something. I am really glad I
brought her that one cup of ice water and get to know her before she
transferred to Congo because we probably would have never met then.

Finally Kristen showed up with her friend Julie form Beatty
Towers [snip]. She doesn't drink much if at all and also is
a people watcher who likes to hang out in a corner. I told her at
work today that I have only had a buzz once in my life and really
don't drink that much, if an effort to similarize myself to her. We
ended up joking around and hanging on each other, constantly
touching, all night long. I had a great time and made some perverted
jokes that she loved. They split at around midnight and I left about
fifteen minutes later after talking with Kevin and Mike for a few
minutes. I saw Dayanara once and she was with a guy but she gave me a
really surprised look when she figured out it was me.

Chris and I had partially been making fun of Kristen while we
were on the platform, although it was mainly him but I was laughing,
too. Fortunately I had an opportunity to make up with her as we were
both unloading for the last two hours. There were no supervisors
around and thus we played the entire time. It was cool because we
were doing so in front of people such as Lisa, Shannon's friend, and
Randy. I was making her laugh and crumple over hysterically quite
often and I liked that.

We were talking about sex quite often and it got extremely
interesting. The highlight of the evening was when we made a joke
about Ronnie and she said something about him joking about sex all of
the time. I asked if I didn't and she told me that I joke a lot
differently than Ronnie does implying that I am more mature and
probably sensuous about the way I do it. I told her that I got over
the phase he is in when I was in junior high and she liked that. I
joke around in a way that spotlights the girl I'm talking to and not
myself, and don't make it obvious that I'm hitting on them like he
does.

It partially started because I kept saying things that could be
taken completely seriously or extremely pervertedly and she learned
quick to do the later, sometimes to my surprise. It was amazing. She
then was trying to make baskets with the guests' basketballs, both
real and plush. She could make the soft ones in, but the hard ones
kept bouncing out. I commented that she's OK with the soft ones but
still needs practice with the hard ones and she loved that. I then
was explaining that sometimes even a hard one doesn't want to just
get tossed in right away, it too needs a little extra encouragement
and so forth. It was great!

At one point she was hugging one of the poles waiting for the
next coaster and looking at me really sensuously. I told her that
she's pretty affectionate with the pole and said it's because she
likes to hold on to things that are big referring to cuddling with a
guy rather than a penis but she took it wrong. We both really seemed
to be having a lot of fun. One of my favorite parts is that all of
this involves a lot of soft yet physical touching of each other and
we both are completely comfortable with doing so. We also will look
at each other extremely sensual and will sometimes have our faces
only inches apart. It's awesome!

She then got serious and was asking how much do I think she
actually knows. I told her that I don't know her that well but she's a
smart person and I know that I know she can figure a lot out on her
own. She then said that she can, but she still has a lot of
questions. I said that she can ask me anything she'd like whenever
she needs to and I'll try to explain them in terms of soft and hard
basketballs as best as possible, but she said not all things can be
explained with them......... I like her.

I also had a lot of fun hitting on Jennifer Sheppard on Sunday.
She just broke up with some guy but likes another who works on the
train. I was trying to convince her over to my side for a long time
and had her hanging all over me, too.

There was also the little girls today. One group of older ones
kept calling my name every time they went by and called me over to
the Bumper Cars' queue when I was walking to lunch. There was another
little group. One of the girls rode a few times before taking off her
shirt revealing her bikini top. I smiled and cheered and said how
happy I was because she was undressing and she laughed and told all
of her friends! Another of the little girls also complimented me on
my eyes!

And today was Cathleen's ninth birthday!!!

March 26, 1994 - Saturday - Golden Key, NeRF room

So far three people have complimented me on how tan I am getting in the past twenty four hours!!! That's awesome. First it was Marty who arrived last night and then it was Karen who came later on. Our residence advisor, Nick, then commented on it as we were getting onto the elevator. Even better was when I saw Holly getting off of the elevator. Nothing better to cheer me up!, not that I'm down or anything.

I've just come back upstairs from over three hours out at the pool It was an awesome day and I roasted darker than ever. It's awesome. There were all kinds of cute girls out there that kept my attention as I lusted over them. And of course I had to go swimming in the pool to help my blonde highlights along and to keep myself from completely dehydrating. At least they have a water fountain out there and I keep myself full.

Ashley and I had made arrangements to go and study on Wednesday sometime earlier. I just remember that she had asked me and said that she would wait for me to get home from my inductions if I wanted her to. I said yes and she wanted a yes or no answer, and of course I said yes. I just liked the way she subtly demanded an answer out of me and actually got one.

I asked Leigh Anne to tag along to my Golden Key National Honor Society inductions at the University Centre Hotel. We ran into Sherry, the girl that drove us to Mardi Gras on the way to one of our classes and Leigh Anne mentioned that I was being inducted. She sounded all impressed and made a big deal out of it, congratulating me repeatedly. That was pretty cool. I think Leigh Anne was a bit surprised at the compliments and said that I am smarter than I look. Cool, I don't look like the fucking nerd genius that I am. Cool.

I told her she could come along at least to take pictures, to be my photographer and she didn't like that to much. I just wanted company and she was looking forward to making fun of everybody with me. We sat through the rather lame ceremony which was much less impressive than Phi Eta Sigma and that was only a freshman honor society. I was disappointed. At least we got to eat at the stale reception. Susanne Conefry is an officer in the club and we saw each other but never said hi. There were quite a few attractive girls there that I lusted over in front of Leigh Anne which was fun. And of course she was pissed as I ditched her to go study with Ashley, but I don't care.

Ashley was ready to go when I got home and we soon headed out. We were both extremely tired already and were a little more somber than usual but still got a good deal of talking in. We also have been saying how we need to make sure and get the same sections in our classes next semester because we probably will be in three of the same classes!!!!! That will be awesome!!! There's nobody I want more to work with than somebody as emotionally and physically attractive, and intelligent as Ashley to work alongside me.

That morning I had gone back to NeRF to sign up for my room and didn't wake up until eight thirty. I knew I should have gotten up at six again but I didn't really care that much. I figured my name penciled in would save me, or what if it didn't. I kind of wanted to be forced back into Beaty so I'd be close to Ashley. I was number 39 when I got there. I ran into Tom, this guy who lives across the hall from us in Beaty, and he was number one in line. By the way, Jon just told Karen that I write a journal and then st

arted spelling her last name. I joked that I'd tell everybody what a horrible drug addict she is. She frowned. I then changed it to this: Karen is the most wonderful person at USF and is a great influence on everybody at UF when she comes to visit. Jon laughed and said that one got a good response!

Anyway, I waited over an hour and flirted with some awesome girls in the process. It's cool that they will be living in the area, too. There are these two twins that live in Beaty now that I find intriguing. I found out their names are Joanne and Allison and they were born on April fool's day, 1974! That's pretty cool! Better yet, their room is in building five, room 203, and ours is supposed to be room 302 in the same building. Cool! Closeness! A girl was then allowed in front of me just to check on her name and found out she had been bumped and couldn't sign up with her roommate. She got hysterical and really pissed and called her friend and was bitching. That really sucks and made me nervous. To my great relief, my name was still there and I got my room quickly with no problems. They say that the girls' rooms fill up quicker anyway because more of them stay on campus than guys do.

On the walk over I walked through Turlington plaza. I had decided to walk this time to look at every girl I could along the way. I saw this gorgeous blonde sitting near a tree and I went out of my way to walk in front of her just to get a closer look. Suddenly she yelled out my name!!!!! and after overcoming the surprise, I realized it was Christina from my German class that I ran into as Adventure Island. We did some quick catching up before I took off but it was really cool to get a chance to talk to her again. She was the one who use to compliment my eyes all of the time...

On the way home I ran into Jenn and we talked for quite a while. She thinks it's so awesome that my roommates and I are living together again and we thought about what a rare chance it is for us all to get along as well as we have. That's when I realized how truly amazing and rare it is and think it will be cool to tell the story later in life. We've almost become our own little family of sorts. How could you not when you will have lived together for at least three years! Jenn told me that I need to hurry and call her so we can do something and I agreed.

I then came across Roswitha walking Ed's bicycle. The thing get's rather pissy if you don't take it on a walk every morning. J/K!!! She was taking it to the music building for Ed so I decided to walk her there. I told her about getting housing and everything and was glad to get to talk to her. I was at the pool later with Leigh Anne on Thursday afternoon and we had just gotten in the pool. Holly was there in her bikini and I was in love!!! Leigh Anne noticed that Roswitha was walking by so I called out her name and waved. I only expected a wave back, but she actually found the gate and came in and sat on the edge of the pool next to me. She had just gotten some pictures developed that she wanted to show me which was cool and I got to lead Leigh Anne into thinking that Roswitha really does go out of her way to talk to me. It's funny because Leigh Anne is starting to think I'm trying to steal Ed's girlfriend again!

October 11, 1993 - Monday - We're still going out!..

Well, I didn't get my letter from Shar¡ today and it pissed me off more than anything. I wondered if she lied about it and if so, then why she did because it would only delay me finding out for a few days before I bitched her out. I was completely ready to call it quits if that's what she is trying to do. I tried to tell myself not to call her until I get a letter, but my willpower isn't that strong. I knew doing so would tear me apart and I don't need that with three exams coming up this week.

I went to today's classes and actually went to my sixth period psychology class, although it was an eternity, rather than rushing home to check the mail. We did get our essays back in my composition class and this had been a pretty major one. I got an A, and a million comments. A lot of times he really liked my points and referred to a couple as excellent or well stated. He left me a note at the bottom of the paper that read, "Most of this paper is very good - clearly written with some excellent insights. there ar points where it could be improved and developed, but what you have done shows talent and intelligence." Damn!!! I was very impressed and in love with what he had told me!!! This for the first draft of a paper, which is always my best. As I read it for the first time as a whole, it did seem to flow marvelously and did touch upon all of the major points he talked about since the papers were turned in. Damn I'm good! My mother reminded me of what a good writer I am by bragging to Ed yesterday and now this from a graduate professor in the English department. I immediately started on an interesting perspective on death in my notebook, which I will complete later.

So I called Shar¡ at five just after the rates changed to the cheaper evening ones. She sounded glad to hear from me. I told her what I had done today and about Coming Out Week, this big fag festival. They put out papers today that said anybody wearing jeans or jean shorts supports the cause. They came in the mail after everybody would already have gotten dressed. It was smart and funny but it sucked. Instead of listening, I talked quite a bit during this phone call. She did ask if I have gotten her letter and I said no, and emphasized a belief that she probably never even sent one but she swore she did. We were talking about before, and she said that she misses getting a letter every three days, because she actually started to feel special. I reassured her that she is special and reminded her that it was her who broke the chains. She really sounds like she feels bad and I told her, jokingly, that I've been sitting and waiting for the mail every day and my life has been totally pointless lately. She said that she really felt bad but I told her not to. It was funny and wasn't as pathetic as I've made it sound.

She told me once that she might be going to Livestock this weekend, and I again expressed my disgust that she won't be with Cord on his actual second birthday. I know it's not that important, and so does she because he is only two. She then told me that she might not be going if she cant find a sitter for him and I said that is good. I was going to offer to go in her place but I never did. I did tell her that Cord might not know the difference now, but when he's old enough, say fifteen, I'll tell him how his mother didn't even stick around for his second birthday! That was funny. I told her that I wouldn't do that to her. I did make it so that it sounded two ways: I could either have been married to her, or just a friend coming up to Cord just by the way I said it. I was careful. She told me that she'll tell him that Daddy Dan wasn't there either (that was awesome because she called me Daddy Dan!!!!!) and agreed that neither was Mommy Shar¡. That was kind of funny and very insinuating. I retorted that I would have come if only she would have stayed...

We were talking about something else and she called me Dear!!! that's the first time I've heard that in over two weeks!!! I called her Dear beach, sarcastically. And we started saying it back and forth to each other and it was rather funny. She finally busted out calling me Honey very sweetly! that at least means we're still going out as of right now! and that's very good news to me because I really wasn't sure... she mentioned again about going to Daytona sometime in the Spring, and I told her to send me a postcard and I'll send one from Mardi Gras! She said that she just might have to make a trip up to go with me and I found that rather funny. I told her about our little talk that you never take a girl that you like to Mardi Gras. I also mentioned about the car full of girls also going, because I know the one and met her over the summer at Busch. Shar¡ asked me something about if I did anything with this girl like I did with her, since I "met" her over the summer as well. I pretended I was confused and I was, why was she asking me this? We kept talking about it and she explained that we got close, and asked if I did with this other girl. She might have thought I was referring to her again as a double person like I did in my letters, because it sounded that way. I told her no, that I've only talked to her twice since I've been up here and she also has stolen my blender.

She then told me that she enjoys confusing me and laughed. I told her that I enjoy pretending to be confused and laughed back! but then told her I was indeed. I then offered to drop it, and she asked what I wanted to drop? The conversation? The topic? Her? I said the topic rather quickly and asked her why I had any reason to drop her. She said that I don't and we made a couple more meaningless statements to that effect. It could have very well just been because I've been acting so oblivious lately which might have caused her to wonder. She later told me that she has something on her mind, and then said that she actually has two things on her mind. I asked her what they are but she still won't tell me the second one. She said that she really wishes I was down there with her. I asked her if that is really what she is thinking, and she said yes.

I asked her about the other thing and calmly pressured her for anything I could get out of her about it. She told me that it's still only half on her mind right now because she's really not trying to think about it yet. She then said, and it took her a while to spit it out that she want's to wait until she figures out exactly how she wants to tell me and said one other statement about waiting for her body to figure it out??? or something really weird like that. I don't remember whether she said it is good or bad this time, but she was leaning towards good I believe. She said that it deals with her, and after a pause, said that it deals with me, too, of course. I told her that I hate to be left hanging like this because now I'll be wondering. I narrowed down a time when she'll be ready to tell me and she finally said that it won't be within a week, but won't be more than a month. I really don't know.

It sounds as if it could be another guy that she's considering and is planning on telling me how much She loves me, but I'm just too different from her in too many ways and so on. I can hear her saying it, too, and probably would be rather relieved that his whole mess is over. I would definitely take it very graciously but would hate the fact that I have to pay such a big phone bill for something entirely nonexistent. I would also tell her that it is a relief because we thought she was pregnant! That would be rather interesting. Chris said that she's probably going to tell me that she wants to marry me, which I took as asking for a commitment and seriously doubt! The whole thing is pretty weird and I don't know what to think. If she is pregnant, she might not want to tell me now in case it is a false alarm and she also might not want to tell me right now if she thinks I'm having second thoughts because she's afraid I'll leave her for good. Damn I want to know!!! My sarcastic little mind keeps telling me shit like she's probably only waiting to ask me what size I wear to get me something for my birthday... or whatever. It's really freaking me out!!!!! I hate to even think about the other guy situation because she just really sounds like she's getting back into us again...

I also told her that I bought Cord an easy to mail birthday present but wouldn't tell her what it was.

I called Jenn tonight for the first time in a long time and we talked for quite a while. She had left me a message last week and I never called her back but I told her that I never got it. She was telling me that she and Chris have decided to date other people and I complained that I wasn't the first person she came running to. She said that we did do a few things together last year and will have to get together soon. She did joke that she checked her mail every day for a week before and a week after her birthday waiting for a card from me because she remembered that I said I'd send one. I told her at the beginning of the year that I lost my address book, though, so I am still in the clear. She knows I got her the yellow gloves for stress but we want to rent the movie and see it again.

August 24, 1993 - Tuesday - Survival of the fittest!

Ashley gave me a call this morning at 8:15, just like she said she would. I then ran downstairs and met her at her door. She was wearing her heather workout outfit with her soft sport bra clearly showing through the sides of her tank top. She looked pretty damn good. She had her hair up in a pony tail and had on just the basic makeup. She had on extra eyeliner that made her eyes really sexy when she'd look at you right. We talked and joked around all the way to class. I hunted forever this morning until I found my razor and shaved. I actually dressed up a little and made myself look as good as possible. I wanted to make up for that gnarly first impression I made last night.

When we got to class we found a couple of seats towards the back of the rapidly filling auditorium. There are almost six hundred and fifty people in that class! She told me that she had her first class as a freshman in that auditorium and it scared the hell out of her because it was the typical movie's representation of college. I had a lot of small classes back then and I didn't have that experience. She's just now pledging into AXê and knows a lot of people but isn't popular enough yet to run around hugging all of the guys in the class like some of the sorority girls were. That means I got to keep the beauty to myself. I saw this girl who was roommates with Tama last year and we talked for a minute and then I talked to Fran‡oise for a few. Ashley kind of just looked at me once and smiled. I was also glad to have Fran‡oise see me with her.

We joked around the entire class time making cool and witty comments. We both really seem to be on each others level about our outlook towards things. Our teacher has that great British accent and it adds some awesome comic relief that wakes us up so early in the morning. Part of the lecture was about Darwin's survival of the fittest and we had a lot to say about that. It was really funny. We also were leaning back and relaxing by the time class was coming to an end. We turned our heads and looked at each other once very sexily. That was really cool. The time kind of flew by and we were joking around some more as we walked to Turlington together. I'd say our relationship is off to a good start. I then ran into the Hub and bought some school books and then headed home.

I gave Laura a call at 12:15 so that we could head over to our chemistry class together. I walked down there to sit with her and her roommate while they ate their salads and we talked for a little while. They asked how Ashley was this morning and I said that she was alright and we actually talked all period. They both asked if she bitched all period or talked about this guy she knows and I when I said no to both they were really surprised. I think I kind of like this girl! She showed up a few minutes later to walk to class with us and a friend form her sorority came as well. We were introduced and they all joked about there being another `Dan!' The new girl then told me that it's really good to be named Dan around that room and smiled... We all then walked to class. I swore I saw Emily walking by and I made sure to let her see me with Laura and Ashley.

We were late to class and I knew there wouldn't be any seats together, especially not three. We walked in and there were a couple of empty spread out ones in the back and we just stood there for a few minutes. I took the initiative and found a row with three empty seats and went into it and made the people scoot all of the way to the end of the row so we could sit together. Laura was a little taken back and I turned to Ashley and told her that was an example of survival of the fittest. She laughed and winked at me. We made it through that class and I asked Ashley to call me again tomorrow morning. I was walking out of our row and told Laura what pretty hair she has and she was shocked that I actually complimented her. I then walked home with her and we parted just the slightest bit shakily. It's time to start being the nicest guy in the world again.

I called Jennifer Hirsch after being home for a while and she was really happy to hear from me. It turns out that there were only two A's in our German class last semester and mine was one of them. That after drinking the beer and all! Ha ha! She whined that Elaine really did love me a lot and it was really obvious. We started reverting to our awesome old conversations about goo and everything else. We both told each other how much we missed each other and having our little conversations. We both agreed that there is nobody else that either of us talk to that talk to each other the way we do. We caught up on the summer and all that's been going on. Of course I never said a word about Shar¡. I ended up eventually giving her my phone number and we promised to go out soon.

I also met the fourth neighbor named Amy while I was outside on the phone with Jenn. She seems really nice and I later told her roommate that I thought she was cute.

I fixed dinner and then gave my lover a call. She actually seemed happy to hear from me and I asked her how my most favorite person is doing. We talked for a good forty minutes and I even got a chance to say hello to Cord. She has him saying my name really well now and he was trying to kiss me through the phone without Shar¡ having to say a thing. That's cool. The kid has good taste! Shar¡ told me that he had been asking yesterday, `Where's Dan?'! That's really cute. We talked about the fact that the first time Shar¡ comes up here, she'll probably be donning Cord. She asked me how I felt about that and I told her that I think it's perfectly fine. Actually he'll be the reason we have to stay home and around campus and spend more time alone together!!!

Shar¡ told me that she did get my letter into the mail today. She warned me again that it does get pretty emotional and tells me how she feels which is exactly what I want. She did say that she thinks I'll like it but not to write to her again until I get it in a couple of days. Oh boy... She tells me that she posed a single outstanding question that I'll probably want to call her about and answer when I get the letter. I can't wait for the thing to get here!!! Right now it's the hottest thing on my mind!

April 29, 1993 - Thursday - Movie with Janet & Goo!

It's just past midnight, and I just recently got home from an excursion with Goo and her friend, Janet. Jenn packed and moved all day long, and was never home when I called. I decided to walk over to Turlington for a little while and study with Cecil and Chris. It turns out that she called right after we left from her apartment. We eventually got in contact with each other, and the two of them picked me up 9:30 to see Indecent Proposal. I got to ride for the first time in a Saturn!

Janet was pretty cute, the tiniest bit overweight, though. She went to high school with Jennifer. We hit it off from the start, and the three of us had a pretty fun evening. We had a really interesting conversation on the way there about Jenn's butter. It seems that Janet was keeping Jenn's butter for her, and today, jenn came and got her butter back. We then started turning our conversation into perverted references about butter. It was hilarious. I then brought up goo, and Janet exclaimed that she's heard about that! It was really funny and I think I made quite a first impression on Janet. I especially liked Goo's company during the movie. She likes to make comments throughout the movie, and apologized for doing so before it began, but I told her that I was glad because I love to do the same thing!

They had a pretty good quote in the movie, `When you have something, the only way to know if it is yours is to let it go free. Only then if it returns to you, do you know that it is truly yours.' I kind of liked that one.

Also, during the movie, Demi Moore was having an emotional breakdown while she was washing he dishes. Jenn commented about how she kept the yellow rubber dish gloves on through the entire scene. She commented that she really wants a pair now, and I told her that I'd send her a pair for her birthday to use when she is stressed out!

We continued to joke around on the ride home. They were still talking about doing something more, and asked what I'd like to do. I regretfully reminded them that I still have an exam Friday morning. They had genuinely forgotten and were willing to let me return home. As they dropped me off in front of Beaty, I had entirely forgotten that this was Jenn's last night until she told me to give her a call as soon as I came back up to Gainesville. It suddenly struck me that I wouldn't be seeing her again for quite some time! We gave a quick yet meaningful goodbye, and Janet and I both exclaimed that we were glad to have met one another.

What fun! I really liked the movie despite the critics' presumed predictability of the plot. Ed thought it was stupid, which proved to me to show his somewhat immature attitude towards relationships. It was a true love movie, and I think Demi is cute. Would you let your spouse have sex with somebody else for just one night for a million dollar hippopotamus?!?

April 28, 1993 - Wednesday - Goo everywhere!, Kimmeth

Yesterday contained a pretty interesting chain of events that ended in a serious ego boost, and a humongous letdown.

I left in the morning to go see Pedro Bernal about my chemistry grade. Jennifer kept telling me not to go because it would ruin my determination for the rest of my exams if I did bad. Well, I did bad. I needed a 92% to get an A in the class, which was almost beyond reach in the first place because of the nature of the course. I'm still pretty happy with a B+ overall because all I have to think about is the large majority of people that fail out of the class from the start, not to mention that very few people qualify for the class in the first place.

Jenn (two n's as she has corrected me many times until I finally got it right) came over yesterday at four after she had finished her communications exam. We had an hour and a half to `prepare' ourselves for the German exam. We had decided the previous night to find out what the effects of a little beer, German of course!, would have on our exams. I have read literature stating that a little is actually better for you. We each had a beer and shared a big plate of French fries. Jon came in once and just laughed at us.

Before I go any further, I think it's important that I mention goo! We decided to go on a little studying spree for German over the course of the weekend. We met up Saturday afternoon and found us an empty room, the comfortable one no less!, in GPA and studied for a couple of hours. We were looking at an old test of mine. I had drawn in an umlaut where one shouldn't have been. Elaine made a little note saying that it was only a little bit of goo on the paper! From the start, we instantly translated it to mean semen. We are always joking about how we give sexual favors to Elaine for better grades. We also were writing shit all over the blackboards making fun of Elaine and all. Our entire conversation started to turn to goo, which turned into sexual juice in general. We would talk about eating goo, drinking goo, how we planned on getting each others goo, and so on. We eventually dubbed each other Goo (Jenn), and Gooý!

As Goo would put it; goo is something you can caulk your bathtub with! She used to watch Bob Vila's show and was commenting on how ridiculous it is. She just happens to remember the bathroom edition. We went to Burger King for `dinner.' I wasn't sure how little Miss Rich Boca Raton Bitch would enjoy Burger King, but we weren't dressed for, and I didn't have the money to eat anywhere else. It turns out that she eats there occasionally,a nd it can't be worse than how she eats in the dorm in their community kitchen. I decided to treat, only under the conditions that she gets an A in the class. She really liked that. We had a hell of a time playing around through dinner. We both like a lot of ketchup, and ended up getting it all over the place.

When Goo called on Sunday, I knew it was her, so I had Ed answer. He said that it was for me, and I asked who it was. She told him that it was Goo calling! Ed started laughing and wouldn't give me the phone. It was funny. We ended up studying for a while in a room in Little Hall. It was the only empty place being so close to exams. It's amazing how full the libraries become. We wrote all kinds of perverted shit all over the boards again. We looked up once to see a cute girl looking in the window laughing at us! It was funny.

Monday night we met at the rock and were very surprised to find an empty room in GPA! We did some pretty serious studying, and had some pretty deep conversations. She was happy that she has been actually getting stuff done, and still playing around while studying with me. I told her that it all depended on the company she keeps, sort of cutting down Derek and Noel. She told me all about Chris, her little dorky boyfriend from Dartmouth. She's flying up there Thursday morning. She said that they talk almost every night on the phone for at least a few minutes. She said that they talked Sunday night for two hours because he is continuing to run around a lot with this `slutty hoar' named Margerie up at Dartmouth, and is then stupid enough to tell her. She essentially gave him an ultimatum that he needs to start putting their relationship before his and his friends, and said that she essentially broke up with him.

We walked to McDonalds this time to eat. We had to both stop at the ATM outside of Burger King. I joked that I was going to look inside for cute girls, and she whined at me. I then said that if there were, I wouldn't want to go, because I'm already with her. It worked rather well. This time was more fun I think, than Burger King, but not by much. I wrote, `Quiet!, do not disturb!' on the door to our room, and it was still empty when we got there!!! We studied some more for a while and had a pretty fun time.

I walked her home, as usual. She really likes the fact that I'll go so far out of my way for her. It then takes us forever to finally leave each other. Just the way that we act around each other when we're leaving, it really seems like I should kiss her!!! I would have a long time ago if it weren't for her boyfriend. It's really confusing. I had a talk with Chris last night for quite a while about that. He strongly agreed that it's always hard to tell with a girl who you've become friends with, because you could ruin everything, but then again you might be missing everything! Every once in a while, we'll be studying and she stop and say that she'd bored. Then she'll ask me in a whiny voice, `Why don't you do something about it?' practically the only thing I could do when she says that would be something sexual, and we do joke about these things enough. She is a little bit immature, or at least she acts that way because she's admitted that she dose so, and maybe she is just looking for someone to mess around with, but doesn't quite know how to start it herself. She might have been brought up thinking that it's not right for the woman to start anything sexual. She is good enough to let me open every door for her. I like that. I don't know!

We were talking about religion the other night on the walk to McDonalds. I wanted to know what her's is. I know that her father is German, and I wondered what her feelings about racism in general are. She told me that she is Jewish! Whoops! I never expected that! She then said that she doesn't really believe that there is a God, which brought about a very interesting conversation. She then said that she doesn't look down upon anybody though for believing, making sure that she didn't hurt me, until I told her that my views are essentially the same as hers.

Anyway, back to last night. She did tell me that she talked to Chris for a little while, and he was the one who called. When we left for German, we ran into Steve, this cool guy from the other Tower. I was then amazed when we ran into Christina on the walk there. the four of us are the only guy girl combinations in the class, and the four of us are pretty good friends. It was cool that we all walked up together at the same time. It almost seemed like we had planned it. Well it seemed that the exam only took me twenty minutes! I then spent an hour correcting it over and over. I walked her home, and Brad decided to tag along. It turns out that a guy jumped off of the stadium today and killed himself!

When Brad finally left, Goo and I stood outside of her dorm and talked for quite a long time. It always takes us forever to say goodbye. We kept trying to figure out what we were going to do later on tonight. I had to go home for a little while because jon was cooking us a chicken dinner. We decided that i'd call her `as soon as I got bored' so that we could do something. She figured that would be in about an hour.

Jon's food was actually pretty good, and I told him so. The chicken was very tender and I jokingly told him that he should have a talk with my mom. I then planned on calling home to find out on what time Friday they are picking me up, and then calling up Jennifer. Instead, I got a call from Emily. That was really good, because if she hadn't of called back, I would have feared that she might have been using me just to help her in chemistry, which I didn't really do that much. I was lad to hear from her. She didn't like the fact that I drank before my German exam, but oh well. The second line then rang, and it was Kimmeth!!! I told her to hold on while I got rid of Emily! I then got to brag about all of the girls I've been talking to.

It turns out that Kimmeth might be leaving for Ft. Lauderdale pretty soon for good. That really sucks and I told her that my summer just went down the drain. I told her that she should wait until the end of summer. She said that she really wants me to come and visit her down there, though. We then talked forever about things we had never discussed before. The hot topics were religion and racism. It turns out that she's half Protestant (hurrah!) and half Baptist, on her father's side. Her mother is from Maine. She said that she's only been to Church about twice in her lifetime, although she does believe somewhat in God. She just believes very strongly that it is a personal matter and should be dealt with individually. Exactly! We had a lot to say on the matter, and I've finally found somebody who feels the way I do about religion, that organized religion is bullshit!

She then told me why she and Chris broke their engagement back in highschool. He became a born again Christian, and that's all he would ever talk about, and would then try to impose all of his beliefs onto her. After many arguments and so on, they just fell apart.

Then we discussed racism. She and I both were saying how extremely prejudice Tampa is. She said that she is not very racist, but there are certain things that piss her off. I had some really strong arguments about racism that she agreed with beautifully. One was hat a lot of times racism has a lot to do with an individual seeing say the actions of a few blacks, and translating it to all of them. It has a lot to do with ones personal experiences with them. We had an extremely interesting conversation. She said that not many racist jokes make her laugh, but some stood out.

She told me one that Mark told her: there was a man driving down a road in Georgia when he suddenly spotted two blacks walking on the side of the road, so he decided to run them over. One hit the windshield and broke it, and the other hit the bumper. A policeman sitting nearby saw the entire incident and pulled the man over. He asked the man if he had just hit the two black men. The driver replied that he had, and asked him what he was going to do about it. The policeman said that he was going to charge the first one with breaking and entering, and the second with damaging public property!

I thought that was hilarious, and later told Chris, who really liked it, too.

Kim then told me that her British boyfriend would joke about them every once in a while. She then said that in England they call blacks coons. My eyes lit up, because I have this little joke that she would love!: What do you call a cocoon? A n-n.....! It takes most people a few seconds to get it, but I knew that she'd catch on right away. She loved it!!! It was really funny!!! I was proud to make her laugh as hard as she did.

She also told me how this guy once turned around to her in high school and said that he has a pretty large family, and sleeps in the same bed with two of his brothers. He then said that every once in a while he'll dream that he's skiing.

She said that she really didn't appreciate that joke, and it usually takes a little while for somebody to get the joke without the hand signal that the teller usually does.

Chris later told me a hilarious joke: One day a Chinese man walks up to a black man behind the counter in a restaurant and says, `I want some dinner n......' The black man got pissed saying that he's tired of people calling him n....., and said that the Chinese m,an would feel differently if the roles were reversed. The Chinese man agreed and they switched places. The black man said, `Give me a drink chink!' to which the man replied, `I'm sorry, but we don't serve n...... here!'

I really liked that one!!!

Kimmeth was telling me that the one guy, Gary, completely ditched her and Dan got a girlfriend. She called gary one last time and left a multiple choice question asking him why he never called her back. She then brought up rejection, and I made up a little question for her. I said asked her why she was calling him, `A:she thought she was being rejected, B:she knew she was being rejected, C:she ...' and then Chris blurted out, `D:I want to fuck you!' and I said, 'D: I want to,' and stopped. I'm not sure if she had heard what Chris said, but I'm kind of sure she had!!! because she seemed to get pretty perky and a little more excited (or maybe appalled, but hopefully not) for about a minute. It was funny.

Kimmeth and I continued to talk for almost two hours!!! Goo called a couple of times and kept saying that she wanted to do something and was bored. I just would tell her to think up something and I'll call her back. I didn't answer the second line three or four times. I complained that Kim would never get to come and see me in Gainesville if she moves now, and she said that she'd come and get me on Saturday if I'd like. I said hat there wouldn't be much for us to do, because nobody is here... wait, what he hell was I saying!!!!... we'd be alone!!!!... Aggghhhhh!!! I don't know. I told her that I'd call her possibly Friday night when I get home. She didn't realize that I was coming home now at first and was really glad to here so.

I never did get to call my parents. I called Goo as soon as I got off the phone. We decided on maybe a movie, we both wanted to see Indecent Proposal. I called the theaters but we had missed all of the shows. We were wondering what to do, and Chris said, `Have her suck your dick!' quite loudly and she said that she already had, and she wasn't going to it twice in the same day. She brought that up again later, and I asked her how come I didn't remember it happening. Next time she should wake me up! She seemed desperate for company, although it was almost midnight, so we decided to play pool downstairs. She had claimed that she plays every once in a while, and now I know how Emily felt when she played me the first time, because Goo really sucks. And you can't whip their butts because they'll feel like shit and hate you. It was interesting, though.

Afterwards, I walked her across the street to her beautiful four door teal Saturn! Once again that overwhelming urge to kiss her was there, just by the way we both act, and how we get so close. She blushed and admitted that we always have the hardest time saying goodbye and I agreed. We finally did, and I walked back home. Goo did forgive me since I said that Kim was moving away to Ft. Lauderdale, which is why I had to talk to her. She got happy when I said that, saying that I could come and visit her! I think she was serious!

Her number for next year in her apartment right up the road from Beaty is: 372-4533. Her birthdate was June 5th 1974. I told her that I want to send her a card at least:


Jennifer Erica Hirsch
1300 Parkside Circle S.
Boca Raton, FL 33486.

My father came up on Monday to carry home most of my stuff. We went to the bank first and changed my mailing address to the one in Tampa. We then got a temporary parking decal for his car, and packed. Ed helped. Afterwards he and I went to Albertson's and bought Turkey and chocolate milk for lunch. When we went back out of the car, he discovered a hole in the top radiator hose! We drove to a little auto parts store that I had gone into when I was looking for a radio fuse, and then replaced it. I actually knew a little bit more about fixing it than he did because I've had to mess with mine so many times. He tried to take the hose off the first time without opening the cap and it remained full of hot liquid. When I did it at the auto store, I opened the cap while he was buying it and all of the coolant sucked out of the hose making it much easier to work with. Then we were all greasy. He left at three, and I went to study with Goo.

Speaking of car trouble, Kimmeth told me that her car broke down twenty miles outside of Tampa on the interstate. Her regulator blew. She had to hitchhike home with this family, and get her car later. The mechanic said that it was the original regulator, and had lasted over sixteen years!!! At least she made it back safe. She said that she had a really good time down there, and I really missed out in Daytona. She said that there were seven seventeen and eighteen year olds there in the room with her, and a couple of them, including Bill's sister were good to go!!! I wonder if one of them would have been her...

April 23, 1993 - Friday - Christina, Jennifer

It's been a seemingly interesting and lucky day, despite the horrible stress of final exams and saying goodbye to yet another group of acquaintances. I woke up early enough to haul ass over to my calculus professor's office to try and find out my exam grade. I wasn't sure if he was holding class or not, and that was my last chance to find out. He said that he was having class, and that he'd tell me there. I then went to Bryant Hall to try and find Sophia for my chemistry lab grade. I ended up with 920 points, with 900 needed for an A! Hurrah! That means I don't have to take the final exam!!!

It hen went to German. I talked a lot to Jennifer and we messed around throughout the period. It was pretty fun. I was being very talkative to everybody. I waved and said hello to Christina. Fran‡oise was sitting next to me and looked especially attractive today. We had talked about going to the beach over the summer, and I already have her phone number. I figured that I might just leave it at that, and call her sometime. I later got the nerve and jovially asked her if she'd like to call me so that we can go. She said yes, definitely!, and she took down my number. I was happy. Jennifer played jealous because I wasn't inviting her. I told her that she is more than welcome to come.

Jennifer and I were being pretty weird. She kept sticking the gum that I just gave her out at me. I would try to grab it, and got her lips once. It was funny. We also will lean our heads back on the wall and just roll them towards each other when we talk. At times our faces are only about six inches apart. I wonder if she'd freak out if I kissed her. Ha ha. Elaine was picking on me during part of an adjective endings worksheet. It was the story of Little Red Riding Hood. I was pronouncing everything very well and got all of the endings correct. I was very happy with myself. It's weird how I've been so happy and jovial lately mixed together with the sickening feeling of doing bad in my classes. It creates some curious feelings.

After class, I was walking with Jennifer. She wants me to call her tomorrow night so that we can study together. Christina then came up to walk with us. Jennifer was crying that nobody was going to be there to walk her home. Poor her. I knew that I definitely was going to walk with Christina to McCarthy, where both of our classes were. I joked that we'd help her find a friend to walk with and Christina thought that was funny.

After Christina and I left her, we talked quite a bit. I was being very bubbly but had fear in the background since my calculus grade was looming ever closer. We were joking around, and she brought up her having to give up her crown from that event in Dunellon. I friends with a fucking beauty queen! And she is damn beautiful!!! She looked at me and told me that my eyes were really sparkling right then, and that they're so pretty! I blushed and we were laughing about it. She said that they might be so bright because I was wearing a blue tank top. I felt special! We continued to chat until we made it to her class. We were joking about something as we parted because we both were laughing pretty hard. She put her hand on my shoulder and slid it down my arm as we said goodbye.

Well, I got a 54% on my exam. The only reassuring part was that it was a B!!! That gave me a final grade of a B in the class, which I'll take and run with. I'm so happy! No more math!!!, for a long time at least!

April 9, 1993 - Friday - Jennifer!, The Sandfords

April 9, 1993 - Friday, Freitag
What an interesting day time I've been having lately. I didn't have a chance to learn my German dialogues and vocabulary, so I skipped class. I had promised Jennifer that I would give her a copy of the German exercises program today, so I planned on meeting her as class was dismissed. I'd walk with her and then go to Calculus. I figured that she would really like the fact that I came to class just for her, and she did. It was really funny as class was dismissed, because as the class filed out the door I greeted them all. Most of them laughed saying that I was a little bit late for class. I walked in and Jennifer was very surprised and happy to see me. Elaine and I started talking, and I don't think she realized that I wasn't there for all of class. That's good.

Noel, Elaine, Jennifer, and I walked together for a little ways before Elaine parted. We were laughing and joking. Noel has been quite ridiculous lately, in Jennifer's standards. He seems to have been drinking a little too much alcohol lately, and Jennifer was mainly aiming hr conversation at me. Later on, Brad joined our group and started talking politics or some bullshit with Noel. Jennifer seemed glad because she could turn her entire attention to me. When it was time for me to go, she whined. I told her that she has the company of the two other guys. She then said that she'd rather walk with me because I'm the only person who seems to care about her general welfare lately. I was happy that she feels that way! She then said that she felt guilty for making me skip calculus on Wednesday, so she'd let me go.

I kind of decided last night to start being the nicest person I can possibly be. Not empty nice, rather caring and intelligent to my female friends. Of course I mustn't lose my sense of humor. I've been that way with Jennifer lately, and it's working rather well. Cool!

I gave her a call when I got home from Calculus. We ended up having a pretty long conversation. We were playing around and I started brown-nosing her. It was pretty funny. She was very surprised and said that she really liked the way I was talking, and then asked if I've ever taken a course in it! I kept complementing her throughout our talk. We also started making a few sexual references. That was good, too. We ended up talking for almost an hour. We were asking each other what we were doing this weekend, and it kind of sounded like she might want to do something with me, but I didn't bite at any opportunities yet. She did say to call her if I wanted to study on Sunday or something.

Ed parents showed up from Sarasota in the middle of the day. They were cooking food and decided to invite me to dinner as well. I helped Mrs. Sandford cook while Ed and his dad did the laundry. She made Progresso minestrone and vegetarian lasagna. I wasn't sure how I'd like them, but both were delicious. I almost ate more vegetables in one night than the entire semester. I usually hate vegetable soup, but this was good enough that I'd buy it myself! There were all kinds of strange vegetables that I would ordinarily shun in the lasagna, but I learning to try new things and am glad.

Afterwards the four of us went shopping at the big mall. Ed's dad was talking to me quite a bit. He came up to me in the room and said, 'You're the smart one, how would you force the people out of the compound in Waco, Texas without violent force?' I just liked the fact that he said that I'm smart, Ed must be talking. Everybody does. I thought for a while and then realized that I'd use tear gas and force them out. When he heard that, he was all happy because that's exactly what he was telling his wife earlier. I was proud of myself. We kept talking in the stores as well and about the cars and trucks that they had on display through the mall. We would guess the sticker prices before we would look. I came damn close every time. Ed would always way over or under guess. I was only four hundred off on one. I was happy with myself again. I guessed $17,500, and it was $17,904!

We were mainly looking and I was flirting with all of the cute girls! Even Ed's dad would join in on the comments!!! Ed's mom would even point them out for us first! What a nice family! I would also talk to his mom when she would be looking at something and needed somebody to talk to about it. It was fun. We then went grocery shopping so that we wouldn't have to do it tomorrow. There were some pretty hot girls in there, too., and some really intimidating foreign girls, possibly eastern European.

I watched House Party with Cecil and Jon and shared a pizza for tonight's entertainment. We talked and watched David Letterman as well.

April 7, 1993 - Wednesday - Melissa, Jennifer, Emily

The world seems to be falling apart for many of the people around me. I've spent so much time trying to comfort both Emily and now Jennifer in the past few days. Their confusion and misery is causing me to be in a very mellow mood. I've been listening to music from the late seventies and early eighties a lot lately. In fact, I'm listening to it right now. It helps to keep you calm.

I left the room late with Chris today. His bike got stolen so he has to walk nowadays. He went to the library and I went to the language lab in Dauer Hall to take the second half of the practice placement exam. The German department is testing it on us to rate how they should use it when placing students that take it for real. I arrived just in time. Everybody else was already there and seated. It was funny how a bunch of people were all trying to say hi to me at once. To avoid confusion I tried to avoid contact with a lot of them. I said hi directly to Fran‡oise. I then heard something and turned around to see Jennifer looking back, and we said hello. Christina also tried to say hello. I talked to Elaine as I came in and she said that I could come up to her office afterwards to find out my test grade from last week.

The test only took half an hour, and then I had the chance to talk to everybody. I coaxed Jennifer, rather easily, to come find out her test grade with me. Brad went, too. We also talked with Fran‡oise and Dianne for a few minutes. On the way upstairs, I looked into a room and saw a really cute girl and made a comment about her being so. Jennifer freaked out and said that I'm not allowed to look at other girls when I'm with her. That surprised me. She's also the kind of girl who will let the guy open every single fucking door for her, not that I'm complaining.

Jennifer was being really hyper, and I kept trying to control her. I was trying to hold her still by the shoulders, but eventually had to sit her down in a chair in the hallway. Elaine had yet to come upstairs to her office. We started talking about her and her boyfriend. She was saying how they are allowed to date other people, and touch, too, but if he sleeps with any other girl, she'll cut his dick off! I was surprised again, and an immediate interest was formed when she said that she'd mess around with other guys. Brad made a rude comment, and she wanted to hit him, but I wrestled with her to keep her under control. It was fun.

Elaine finally showed up, and gave us our tests. She said that she'd take us one at a time because her office is so small. Jennifer started whining that she needed me to be there for moral support. Elaine sort of laughed and we moved into the next office. She was asking if Veronica was in her office, and I said no, that she just left. They all thought that I was bullshitting and didn't know who Veronica is, but I really did. It was funny. I asked Elaine about the picture of Melissa from last semester. She was glad that I remembered about it, because she was going to let me have it and kept meaning to bring it to me in class. She then gave us out tests. It was a pretty hard section, but I did pretty damn good, an 87%. Jennifer was really pissed off and hurt because she only got a 75% and she felt like she had done much better. Elaine gave me the picture a we left.

The picture is beautiful!!! Except that Melissa has her eyes shut. We are centered in the picture, and Cindy and Fran‡oise are to our sides. It's practically every girl that I cared about last semester in that class. I'm so happy to finally have a real picture of Melissa, especially since I'm in it, too! What memories that picture will bring back...

Jennifer was really mad, and I decided to walk her home and talk. She asked me to come upstairs with her so that she can cry and complain to me. I decided to skip Calculus and hang out with her. We talked, and she asked me what's she going to do. I tried to help as best I could, and say he right things. I told her that I wish I knew what to say to make her feel better, but I don't. I was using all the lines that I thought of after I was talking to Emily on Monday. I was trying to help as best I could. She told me a story from her biology class. They were discussing ecology and environmental problems. The teacher told them to break up into smaller groups and discuss methods that might help solve some of these problems. She was called upon as a spokesperson for her group. Her response, `kill the people.' I agree fully!!! I think I came up with that idea in high school once. There are so many useless, sick, and unhappy people in the world that only lead to worse and worse conditions. Kill them.

I had to leave just before three to go to chemistry lab. I walked in right after Emily. Today was the day that we needed a partner, and we worked together. Like there was ever a doubt. I asked her how she was feeling, and she said good somewhat enthusiastically. I'm not sure that was good. She's in the mood to make some pretty rash decisions right now, and I'm hoping to help change that. She was a little mean today, and she said that I was acting as if I was in a pissed off mood. I was pouting when she was mean, and actually went far enough to make her feel guilty. I need to do some serious making up tomorrow in class!!! I didn't mean to carry it so far, but she did upset me a little. I think we both were just getting really frustrated with the lab which we had to do entirely because the answers were all data, not written out questions which can be copied, not that I'd do such a thing.

We were hanging on each other again, a lot. We would stand together, pressed against each other, and would gently rock back and forth gently pushing each other. She has been putting her arms around me to emphasize a point just as much as I do her lately. I think the other guys in lab got the point. We also will rest on each other, which can be a little interesting. We kept playing with each other hands, too. She laughed once and told me that we'll have to wait until after lab to hold hands! We then talked about amusement parks for a little while, and she told me some stuff about her childhood again, about going once to Coney Island and riding the roller coasters. She also says that she was scared of the big slides that you rode down on potato sacks. So was I!, and I told her.

I then had the honor to teach her what a 69 is!!! She knew it was sexual, and had a sexual reference when I said it, but she then asked exactly what it means. I drew a 69 on a paper and said that the balls represent each head. She asked what the stick parts were, the arms. I corrected her, saying that it's the rest of the body. She thought about it for a second and aid that it's not really sex then. I laughed and said that it definitely is, except you use your mouths instead, both at the same time rather than taking turns! Everything suddenly clicked and she freaked out wanting to know where I learned about it from. I said that it's common knowledge from high school, not really knowing what else to say. It was really funny!

I had mentioned halfway through lab about wanting to go to this record shop across the street after lab, and said that she could come with me. I didn't really say anything afterwards,. She actually asked if I still wanted to go, and then we did. They didn't have anything that great, though. They had a used copy of the new Garth Brooks CD a couple of weeks ago and I wish that I would have bought it. It's really smart to buy used CD's because the recordings don't age because a laser is used. Only a bad scratch can ever downgrade the quality of the music. It's also about half the price of a new CD.

We then walked to a pizza place called Leonardo's and had dinner. There was a cuter blonde alternative girl there with her friends who kept flirting with me. One thing that I like, and she knows this, is when a guy and a girl sit together on one side of a four seated table. I sat across from Melissa at Cafe Gardens that time, which might have been a major mistake. A very major mistake!!! I might have once or twice at the beginning with Kimmeth but never anymore. I chose the table, and when she arrived, she sat next to me on the one side, thankfully. I complained when the waiter at Bono's put us across from each other at a table for two, asking what if I had wanted to sit next to her? Of course, I did...

March 31, 1993 - Wednesday - Do I still love Jen?!?

March 31, 1993 - Wednesday, Mittwoch
Emily and I just parted for the evening. She'll get frustrated and stressed as our chemistry problems get harder, and will all of the sudden leave in a hurry. Sometimes it's annoying because I won't know if I've done something to offend her, but I think she just gets frustrated with herself. She almost wanted to change her major th other evening, because it only gets harder, and it took me a little while to hopefully convince her not to.

Anyway, I went to German today and sat between Jennifer and Fran‡oise. Jennifer has been unbelievably friendly lately. We were joking around all through class. Elaine asked me a question once but then quickly asked somebody else when she saw that I was laughing away with Jennifer. She was also doodling on my arm. I made some kind of mistake and Jennifer told me not to worry, because she still loves me. She asked me a little earlier if I still loved her, but I don't remember exactly why. It was funny, and weird. She got really hyper towards the end of class. We talked some on the walk after class, too.

After calculus, which has seemed so easy lately even though this is the hardest material, I went to chemistry lab. It started raining just after I got there, and Emily arrived quite late. She came in soaking wet because she went biking through the rain to move her car. She looked pretty cute soaked down like that. She was wearing a white T-shirt and it showed through. She wears these cute little lacy bras with very thin straps in the back. You know, why overdo it when you don't need much support anyway! That's mean!

We talked and played around a lot as usual. We talked a little about the concert. She did mention that Cindy and I really seemed to hit it off there. Glad she noticed. That was kind of the point...

January 19, 1993 - Tuesday - Emily, Jennifer

All of the little problems that arouse this past week have all seemingly been resolved. Emily and I are going along pretty nicely, and I just received and had a good phone call with Jennifer. I also had a pretty cool weekend. Ed and I were the only two of us left here in the room this weekend. We pretty much cruised the town and did quite a bit.

I woke up a bit early this morning. How could I sleep with Chris making all of that racket and spraying his stinky hair spray all over the place. I buried my head in my pillow and rested up a bit longer before getting up. I grabbed my little bag of parcels that I planned on mailing today before I left. One was Kimmeth's birthday present. I ended up giving her a really nice pair of panties from Victoria's Secret and a dubbing of the Toy's soundtrack. I wrapped them in the pretty floral paper and white box that the salesgirl at Victoria's Secret gave me. I stuffed the box with some of the magazine shreds that Tracey used for my Christmas present. I also threw in a card. I asked her when she is going to start lying about her age so that I can start catching up! I thought that was cute. I also mailed a couple of Financial Aid Forms home. I addressed the yellow envelope in big black letters to Cathleen just to be cute. I also wrote her a one page letter in class today before I sent it off.

I got to chemistry lecture just as the class before was getting out. I looked for Ed and Chris, but didn't see them. I walked up behind Emily and said hello. We talked about our weekends and some other stuff as we went in and sat down. She and I are officially referring to our professor as Pedro, his first name, from now on in our private conversations. It's funny. We seem to both really enjoy pressing against each other as we write, and even when we're just sitting there. We've always sat in a way that we're both leaning very much towards each other. At one point today, she was practically lying on my shoulder and could have easily fallen asleep. It's quite interesting. We joked around throughout class and had a pretty good time, for a chemistry lecture. I did actually pay attention to Pedro today to try and make up.

He told us something about picking up our quizzes on the fourth floor at the end of class. We decided to go up there and try to find the office. We then realized that he was talking about an entirely different building. There was this freaky little nerd guy that kept following us around trying to help us find it. He was looking himself, but just wouldn't shut up. I finally told her to hurry up so that we could ditch him, and we did. There were these indentions every once in a while along the walls, that had a big emergency shower in it. We thought they were funny, and I kept gently trying to pull her into them.

Afterwards, we both had an hour to kill before our next class so we walked over to Burger King across the street for breakfast. It wasn't until then that I realized that I had forgotten my wallet. I was especially pissed because that meant I had to go home again before I could mail the packages. Her birthday's on Sunday and I really wanted it to get there on time. She was kind enough to force me to borrow money from her, with which I bought a chocolate milkshake. It was funny because I was right behind Dietrich in line. He's the funny looking German grad student/teacher with a long brown pony tail. He truly looks like a horse. Melissa and I used to joke about him and Elaine liking each other because they were always together. What really surprised me was the fact that he was clean shaven.

When I reached the table, Emily had gotten a newspaper for each of us, and I thanked her. I had a chance to look at her driver's license in line, and I asked if I could see it again. The picture was taken when she was fifteen, and she looked pretty cute, much better than her Student ID picture but those are always bad. Her last name is Weber, and her birthday is October 20th, 1972. That makes her twenty. Jen just stopped by for a second. She wanted to know if I knew any military training songs. Weird. She has to know one for ROTC tomorrow morning. Oh yeah, Emily 'accidentally' saw one of the articles about me in my notebook and got to read about my accomplishments. It made it seem in no way like I was bragging. It worked pretty well. Anyway, she drives the same Oldsmobile 88 that her parents brought her home from the hospital in. Her father bought her a newer car now, though. When I asked her what it is, she sort of snickered, and then said a station wagon. Ha ha. I told her at least she has a car that she can drive.

We talked about a lot of other stuff. She had a calculus quiz that next period so I let her study for a few minutes. When Dietrich (I call him Dieter because it's shorter) left, I said, 'There goes Dietrich!' She seemed surprised, and asked if I knew him. It was funny because she dated his roommate for a little while. She even mentioned Elaine's name when I was talking about him liking my teacher. That was weird. She says that this guy was thirty and a grad student when they went out. I joked that it was looked upon as bad when I was chasing a twenty-four year old this summer. She said that was different because I was only seventeen. We were laughing a lot as Dieter left and I glanced at him and I'm sure he thought we were laughing at him. Good, because at that point we were. I really want to mention something to Elaine. Emily was very quick to point out that she stopped seeing him, because she didn't make that too clear for a second. She said that she liked him, even though he was a real asshole, because he made her think. Chris and I had talked about the asshole part and I complained to her how it sucks that the girls always like the assholes, because that's bad for me. It was cute.

We sort of walked half way between both of our classes before we split. I gave her my phone number before we did in case she wants to call. I was happy. I then walked over to my social problems class. There is this pretty cute girl in there, and we always sit in front of or behind one another. I've talked to her a few times and flirt with her heavily. She's very seductive and looks definitely like sorority. I really want to get to know her soon. Fun. Our professor then walked in. I was writing Cathy's letter at the time. On Tuesdays we have a two hour class, but he was dismissing us in ten minutes because he has to pick up his son at the daycare. I really wasn't expecting that but was glad of it. I went home and Ed walked in about the same time. He had a package to mail as well, and also had two hours before his next class just like me. We decided to drive to the huge regional post office down the road and mail our stuff from there. It's the biggest and nicest post office I have ever seen. My stuff was also pretty cheap to send. I guess I'm use to mailing stuff overseas. It was better because our packages will most likely be on there way much quicker than from the puny office on campus.

Ed woke me up a little while ago because of Jennifer's phone call. I was really glad to hear from her, and told her, too. She had a pretty good time in Boca Raton this weekend. She said that it rained almost the entire way down on Friday, and then was cold on Saturday. We talked about a bunch of other stuff as well. We both saw Scent of a Woman this weekend starring Al Pacino. I thought it was really good, and if I think a movie without many women in it is really good, then it's a pretty good movie! We decided on studying tomorrow night for German. She also told me that I need to call her more often so that she stops waking me up from my naps.

Ed and I worked out three times this weekend. We also went bike riding. We actually got in to the stadium and were riding up and down the big spiral ramps to the upper levels. It was fun and probably the only opportunity that we'll get to be in that stadium while it's empty. Working out is getting to be fun. I'm really in to it this time. I actually gained six pounds this weekend! I used the same scale and was actually wearing less clothes the third day. It might have had a bit to do with the Pizza Hut lunch buffet on Monday though.